


Do You Remember?

by JAMES_BUCHANON_BARNES_YES



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/F, fem!bucky barnes, fem!steve rogers - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-19
Updated: 2017-06-19
Packaged: 2018-11-16 02:16:46
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 4,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11244270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JAMES_BUCHANON_BARNES_YES/pseuds/JAMES_BUCHANON_BARNES_YES
Summary: Basically Stevie and Bucky are women, it starts in the middle of Winter Soldier, and it focuses heavily on memories.





	1. Chapter 1

Stevie could remember the way it was before everything. Before the serum, before HYDRA, before the war. Before all of the events that led to this moment right now. She remembered a before. It was all bubbly laughter, flowing dresses, soft hair and charming smiles. It was protection, friendship, home. That was not what she was seeing now. Now she saw hard eyes and ruthlessness. The face of her best friend had been completely transformed into a shell of its former self, a ghost, a shadow. Her soft pale skin had been covered in hard, black edges of knives, guns, and armor. What had happened to her?

The winter soldier could not remember the before. She had no memory of the laughter and friendship that had been shared. All she knew was cold, barbed edges. She was a killer, monster, beast, a soldier. That was all she knew. She couldn’t make sense of the expression that shattered the other girl’s face. Horror, grief, guilt, betrayal. Why was there a shake in the other woman’s voice? Yet she could feel something… some instinct, some bond, still there, deep within her, even after years of being nothing but a ruthless killer. There was something in her that made her stop. Why did she stop?

Both women just stared at each other for a moment, the anguish encased within their silence unspeakable. Stevie was thrown back into 1940, remembering the soft fondness of the girl she’d once known. The girl Bucky had once been. The soldier’s mind was completely blank. She had no recollection of the blonde standing in front of her other than what she’d been told. Captain America. Stephanie Rogers. Mission: kill. That was all she knew. That was all she needed to know… right? The blonde wore civilian clothes, her long hair billowing behind her unmoving shoulders in the breeze. She held the metal shield in front of her defensively, but her eyes were large blue puddles, saucers, circles of awe. They were the eyes of a child from the 1930s, and the soldier’s mind was thrown into a series of sudden flashes:

Stevie on the ground, bleeding.

“Call me Bucky.”

Stevie, so small, so frail, held in her arms.

Laughter singing from both girls hearts as they walked down a sidewalk together.

“Bucky!” screamed Stevie’s anguished voice.

Stevie’s hand, reaching out, grasping at the air, getting smaller and smaller.

The soldier had no grasp on what was happening. She… knew Stephanie Rogers. Somehow. This woman standing in front of her. She knew her… a friend. Stephanie Rogers was her… best friend. Stevie?

“Bucky?” The other woman asked, staring incredulously at the soldier in front of her.

“Who the hell’s Bucky?” the black-clad woman asked, snapping back to her cold reality. She pulled out a knife and lunged forward, crushing the brief moment of calm that had passed between the two. She was the Winter Soldier. She had a mission to complete.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pre-war memory.

“God, Stevie, how do you keep getting yourself into these messes?” Bucky’s voice was affectionate as she helped a bleeding Stevie up from where she sat against a brick wall.

“Oh, come on, Jamie! He was being a jerk, and deserved everything that came to him.” Stevie said, her honor seeping through.

“Yeah, everything that came to him by me.” Bucky said, “And what did I tell you about calling me Jamie? I’ve told you a thousand times: call me Bucky.” Her soft arm was warm as it wrapped itself protectively around Stevie’s shoulders, their dresses swishing as they walked out of the alleyway.

“C’mon, Bucky’s a boy name.” Stevie said, even though she knew she would always use it.

“Do I look like I care?” Bucky asked, her long, blonde hair getting in her face a little as her ruby lips grinned. Stevie smiled softly back up at her.

“Not really, jerk.” Stevie said, her voice soft as she continued to smile.

“We’ve gotta get you cleaned up, ya little punk. That’s all I really care about right now.” Bucky led Stevie’s small frame down the street.

“Why? Where we goin’ tonight?” Stevie asked, tripping on her own feet.

“Didn’t I tell you?” Bucky looked down to make eye contact with her smaller friend, “We’re going to the future. An’ you can’t be seen there in a dress as torn up as that.”

“Oh, that’s right, the expo. And hey! What’s wrong with my dress?” Stevie looked down at her dress: it was ripped badly and had a bit of blood on it from her fight. “Oh, I guess I kinda see your point.” She admitted reluctantly as they climbed the stairs to Stevie’s apartment.


	3. Chapter 3

The soldier shook her head from side to side, hitting herself in the forehead with her flesh right hand. What was this? Stephanie Rogers was her… friend? Yes. That felt right. Stevie Rogers was her best friend in the entire world. So… what? What was she supposed to do now? She had explicit orders to kill Captain America. She had to follow through on her mission or there would be… consequences. After all, she was the Winter Soldier, an assassin who had never failed to eliminate a target. Not once. But she was Bucky. That was the name Stevie had called her. Bucky. It sounded odd when the soldier tried to match that name to herself. The name was kind’ve soft, rich, kind. Nothing like what she knew of herself, but somehow… it felt right. It fit. Why?

“Mission report.” came Pierce’s hard, demanding voice. Bucky didn’t respond. She didn’t even look at him. He mind was elsewhere. “Mission report. Now.” Pierce demanded once more. Bucky still didn’t move her eyes. Slowly, Pierce stepped closer and crouched slightly. Bucky paid no attention to her higher-up. Immediately, she felt a sharp pain shoot through the entire left side of her face from Pierce’s unbridled backhand. Bucky’s eyebrows pulled together, her mind slow, foggy, as her eyes continued to ignore Pierce.

“That woman on the bridge.” Her voice was ragged, distant. “Who was she?”

“You met her earlier this week on another assignment.” Pierce spoke definitively, as if daring the soldier to say otherwise.

“I knew her.” Bucky finally looked Pierce right in the eye, for the first time in her memory directly questioning authority. She had a good sense that she was making the right choice.

“Your work has been a gift to mankind. You shaped the century. And I need you to do it one more time.” Pierce’s voice drove into Bucky’s ears. “Society's on a tipping point between order and chaos. Tomorrow morning we’re gonna give it a push. But: you don’t do your part, I can’t do mine, and HYDRA can’t give the world the freedom it deserves.” Bucky was silent for a second, afraid to go against Pierce a second time. It was a decent speech, but Bucky couldn’t listen to it. Her mind didn’t stray from the image of Stevie’s face from earlier. Betrayal mixed with hope.

“But I knew her.” She said resolutey. Doubt filled her, yet she knew. Pierce turned around and began to walk away.

“Prep her.” Came his orders to the other men in the room.

“But she’s been out of cryo for too long…” A doctor said, unease evident in his voice as he looked over at Pierce worriedly.

“Then wipe her, and start over.” Pierce spoke coldly, as if Bucky wasn’t even a person. In many ways, she wasn’t. Hadn’t been in a long time. Bucky’s eyes still displayed a ferocious disobedience as she was pushed back against her chair and strapped in on both sides, given something to bite down on. She breathed heavily, afraid for the first time in her memory as metal clamped down on her head. There was a whirring in her ear as she cried out in agony, all her muscles tense against the pain and terror. Pierce walked out of the room, his face icy and emotionless, ignoring Bucky wails as she was tormented. She was nothing but a machine, an assassin, a soldier, designed to follow orders and kill. Nothing could stand in the way of that.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Till the end of the line, pal.

One step. Another. Stevie’s feet felt like lead, heavy and without any purpose as she trudged up the stairs to her apartment. She was well aware of Bucky walking behind her, but had no intention of speaking to her. She wanted to get away from all of it. Everything was too much just then.

“How was it?” Bucky’s voice behind her was kind and gentle. She wasn’t going to leave, because she knew Stevie would never ask for help, but she clearly needed it. Right then more than ever.

“S’okay. She’s next to Dad.” Came Stevie’s emotionless reply. She kept walking.

“I was gonna ask,” Bucky began, the two girls slowing down as they reached Stevie’s apartment door. Bucky didn’t want her friend to be alone that night. Stevie turned around.

“I know what you’re gonna say, Buck. I just…” Stevie trailed off, digging around in her purse for her keys.

“We can put the couch cushions on the floor like when we were kids.” Bucky continued, pleading to all the gods that Stevie wouldn’t insist on being alone after her mom’s funeral. “It’ll be fun! All you gotta do is… shine my shoes, maybe take out the trash.” She leaned down and moved the brick off of Stevie’s spare key. Bucky knew that Stevie would want to take care of herself, but she refused to let her do so. “C’mon.” She begged as she held the key out for her friend.

“Thank you, Buck,” Stevie said, taking the key, “But I can get by on my own.”

“The thing is,” Bucky said, trying so hard to get Stevie to see that Bucky would always be there for her, “You don’t have to.” The taller girl put her hand on Stevie’s shoulder, squeezing it tightly. “I’m with you till the end of the line, pal.”


	5. Chapter 5

“I’m not gonna fight you.” Stephanie Rogers said, her breath coming out in heavy gasps as she let her shield fall from the sky. “You’re my friend.” With these words Stevie was pleading for so much more. With these words, she was begging. ‘Please remember me. Please. I can’t do this again. I already lost you once. Please come back to me. Please.’

Shouting, the Winter Soldier lunged forward, Grabbing Stevie by the waist and slamming her against the glass floor where they stood. She held Captain Rogers still with her legs as she raised her metal fist. “You’re my mission.” was her brutal reply, eyes full of fire as she slammed her fist down into Stevie’s face. Then again. Over and over again with all her strength, it hit Stevie like a sledgehammer. Captain America didn’t even fight back, just tried her best to breath as her face grew bloodier and bloodier. The soldier raised her fist once more, high in the air, prepared to heartlessly kill the woman beneath her.

“Then finish it.” Stevie breathed out, barely able to speak, “‘Cause I’m with you till the end of the line.”

Something broke. Shattered. Melted. In that moment the Winter Soldier died. Bucky just sat there, large brown puppy dog eyes unsure of where to go or what to do. Those words. Those words struck a chord deep within her. She physically could not bring her arm down to kill Stephanie Rogers. Bucky stared down at her best friend, completely terrified as a fragment of a memory surfaced. It was enough to get her to freeze, her dark, choppy hard flinging into her face as her ragged breathing practically stopped. Stevie.

With a crash, the helicarrier shifted. Stevie fell down, farther and farther away. Her eyes stayed locked on Bucky’s as her hand reached out, grasping at the air, getting smaller and smaller. Bucky had seen that before. Without thinking, she dove down after her target. Her friend. Stevie Rogers. Somehow, Bucky couldn’t let Stevie Rogers die. She just couldn’t bear it.

Bucky’s boots were heavy as she dragged Stevie’s body from the water. Stevie was breathing, so she’d survive. But Bucky couldn’t stay there. She knew that. She didn’t know who she was anymore, nor did she know what she was supposed to do now. She just left Stevie lying there, unconscious on the sandy beach as the world collapsed around them. She just walked away. That was all she could do.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another pre-war memory.

“Hey, Stevie, whatcha doin?” Bucky asked, leaning on the back of Stevie’s chair, peering over her small blonde head.

“God, buck!” Stevie cried, practically jumping out of her skin. She held her sketchbook against her chest in the desperate hope that Bucky hadn’t seen it. “Don’t sneak up on me like that!”

“You drawin’, hon? Whatcha drawin’?” Bucky asked, coming around to the front of the chair.

“It’s not very good…” Stevie said, still holding her drawing against her chest.

“But what is it?!” Bucky begged, reaching forward to grab the sketchbook. Stevie snatched it away.

“None of your business, that’s what. Besides, I’m not doing it justice.”

“Fine, then. Don’t tell me. I’ll just sneak into your home in the middle of the night and steal your sketchbook.” Bucky said with a devilish smile.

“You wouldn’t.” Stevie said, almost gasping.

“Oh, but I would. It’s your fault anyway for givin’ me a key.” Bucky responded coolly, putting her hand on her hips and laughing.

“Jerk.” Stevie said.

“Punk.” Bucky giggled, picking Stevie up so she could sit down.

“Ahem!” Stevie said, disgruntled, as she was plopped on the floor in front of the chair.   
Bucky just laughed harder. Stevie closed her sketchbook and placed it on the floor before climbing onto bucky’s lap.

“Wow!” Bucky taunted teasingly, “You’re so lightweight. How old are you, little girl, seven? Six?”

“Aw, c’mon, Buck!” Stevie protested.

“Relax, Stephanie Grace Rogers, I’m only kidding!” She enunciated Stevie’s name dramatically. Stevie elbowed her in the gut.

“Ow! Jeez, Stevie. I said I was kidding!” Bucky said, her voice going up to soprano from it’s usual alto.

“Alright alright, fine.” Stevie said, though she didn’t get up from Bucky’s lap.

“And, just to let you know, you have really sharp elbows. Must be ‘cause you’re so bony!” Bucky joked. Stevie elbowed her again. “Okay! Okay! I’ll stop!”

“Finally.” Stevie rolled her blue eyes and got off Bucky’s lap. She scooped up her sketchbook and sat in the chair opposite Bucky’s continuing her drawing of Bucky.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Captain America Exhibit.

Denied enlistment due to poor health as well as being a woman, Stephanie rogers refused to give up. She was determined to serve her country, and was chosen for a program unique in the annals of American warfare. One that would transform her into the world’s first super soldier.

Battle-tested, Captain America and her Howling Commandos quickly earned their stripes. Their mission: taking down HYDRA, the Nazi rogue science division.

Best friends since childhood, Bucky Barnes and Stevie Rogers were inseparable on both schoolyard and battlefield. Barnes is the only Howling Commando to give her life in service of her country.

The narrator’s voice stopped, and Bucky looked at a video of a woman with a british accent, Peggy Carter.

“That was a difficult winter,” Peggy Carter told the camera, “a blizzard had trapped half our battalion behind the German line. Stevie, uh, Captain Rogers, she fought her way through a HYDRA blockade that had pinned our allies down for months. She saved over a thousand soldiers. Including the man who would become my husband, as it turned out. Even after she dies, Stevie is still changing my life.”

Bucky moved past the video of Peggy Carter to look at a picture of Sergeant Barnes. It was like a mirror, only different. The person Bucky was looking at had confidence, a general air that she knew what she was doing. A slight smile on her courageous face. Her long, dark hair was well-groomed and pulled back into a mostly-intact bun on the top of her head. The few loose strands of hair were blowing in a wind that presumably had been present at the time the photo was taken. She wore a military uniform in the black and white picture. That woman clearly knew who she was. The Bucky standing in the museum was less sure. She read the text next to her face:  
Sergeant Jamie Becky “Bucky” Barnes was the childhood best friend of Stephanie Rogers. When the two were thirteen, Bucky protected Stevie from bullies, and they were friends from that moment forward. In an art class years later, the two heard that America had joined the Second World War. Over the next two weeks, Bucky trained Stevie at Goldie’s Boxing Gym. Together, they visited a US Recruiting and Induction Center in New York where both were initially rejected due to being women. Stevie, however, would not give up, so neither would Bucky.

The two visited a second Recruitment center, where they met Peggy Carter. Miss Carter helped them to enlist in the army despite them being women, due to Carter’s position at an army boot camp. Stevie was classified as 4F and rejected from service once more, but Bucky was accepted into the army, attaining the title of Sgt. Barnes of the 107th. A year later, the 107th was captured by HYDRA, and saved by none other than Stephanie Rogers, Captain America.

From that point on, Stevie, Bucky, and a select few others from the 107th became the Howling Commandos, serving their nation by going on special missions that targeted HYDRA bases and wiped them out. On one of these missions, Sergeant Barnes fell off a train into an icy ravine. To this day, Barnes remains the only Howling Commando to give her life.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Memory of Captain America.

“Sergeant James Barnes… 107th… Barnes…” She lolled the words out of her mouth. She had been strapped to an operating table for a little over a day now. There was nothing left in her but to repeat her name and rank. Why had she thought it was a good idea to enlist in the army? She really hadn’t had to. She was a girl, for Christ’s sake, it had taken so much effort to get into the army. That’s right, she’d done it because of Stevie. She’d somehow made it into the army… and then she’d been captured. Just like that. Lying on an operating table, reciting her name and rank. What a sad way to end her life.

“Bucky?!” Came a voice from her left. She tried to see the figure that was rushing toward her table, but she couldn’t quite make it out. “Oh my god…” The person muttered. Bucky stopped speaking to try to get a closer look at whoever was undoing her restraints. It was a woman, how shocking. A tall, muscular woman, clad in a leather jacket and a helmet that barely covered a strange, spangly outfit of red white and blue. “It’s me,” The woman spoke to Bucky as she finished undoing the straps of the operating table, “It’s Stevie.” Starting to sit up, Bucky took a closer look at her rescuer.

“Stevie…” Bucky said, completely flabbergasted, but glad to see her best friend.

“C’mon.” Stevie breathed, pulling Bucky into a standing position, supporting her weight as she was not able to hold herself up just yet. “I thought you were dead.” Stevie spoke, looking at her companion. She gripped Bucky’s shoulders just to make sure that she was real.

“I thought you were smaller.” Was all Bucky could say, because Stevie’s physique had changed quite drastically. The tall, heavily muscled woman standing before her was nothing like the thin, weak, somewhat sickly girl that Bucky knew. And yet her voice was the same. General facial structure was the same. Her eyes were the same and she still cared about Bucky immensely.

“C’mon.” Stevie said hurriedly, practically carrying Bucky out of the room.

“What happened to you?” Bucky asked, feeling like it was a dream. She was being saved, and Steve was… well like that. Maybe she’d finally died.

“I joined the army.” Stevie said. Huh. Somehow that didn’t seem plausible to Bucky, but she was too distressed in that moment to question it too much.

“Did it hurt?” Bucky asked. She was curious as to what happened that caused Stevie to go through such a transformation, but mostly she just really wanted Stevie to be alright.

“A little.” Stevie Rogers admitted. Bucky knew that was Stevie-talk for “It was the most excruciatingly painful thing you could ever imagine.” but she said nothing of it.

“Is it permanent?” Bucky asked as they rushed down an empty corridor.

“So far.” Stevie answered, though there was no doubt in her voice. As they rushed out of the hallway towards a series of catwalks, sudden explosions shook the whole building. Their world was plunged into a fiery, hellish landscape. Stevie turned and began to climb a set of stairs. Bucky followed her, because she seemed to know where she was going.

“Captain America!” Came a German accented voice from their left. Both women stopped and turned to look at another woman standing by an elevator. She stood there in a long, black, leather trench coat that was buttoned all the way up to her neck, with black leather gloves, and black leather boots. Her dark brown hair was pulled back into a tight bun on the back of her head. Her eyes were sunken back slightly from her head, but, despite this, she was incredibly handsome. Ominous, yet beautiful. It was as if she knew she was evil and embraced it. The terrifying vibes this woman gave off sent chills up Bucky’s spine. “How exciting!” the woman continued, handing a black briefcase to a bespectacled man to her right, “I am a great fan of your films.” The woman began to walk across the platform she was standing on. As she turned, the red emblem on her trench coat was revealed to the Americans: a skull with six tentacles protruding from it, surrounded by a red circle. The symbol of HYDRA. It definitely added to the destructive air that this woman gave off.

The woman stepped forward onto a catwalk, and Stephanie followed suit on the other end of the platform. “So,” Began the lady, her German accent strong, though she enunciated her english perfectly, “Dr. Erskine managed it after all. Not exactly an improvement, but, still, impressive.” As they neared each other, Stevie didn’t hesitate. She just slammed her fist into the right side of this woman’s clearly defined jaw. She stumbled back.

“You’ve got no idea.” Stephanie told her.

“Haven’t I?” The woman threw a punch Stevie’s way. She held up her prop shield to defend herself. The punch left a thick, fist-shaped dent in the metal. No normal human could have done that. Stevie looked frantically from her shield to the leather-clad lady standing before her. Stevie reached into her holster to draw her gun, but was knocked off her feet by the other woman’s powerful blow. As the German advanced, Stevie thought quickly, kicking her foe in the chest with both feet so that she tumbled backward.

The man with the glasses standing on the other side of the catwalk pulled a lever, and the catwalk split in two, bring Captain Rogers and the German back to where they started their advances from. Both women regained their stature, standing at their full and staring each other down. “No matter what lies Erskine told you,” The German shouted across the space, “You see, I was his greatest success!” With that she proceeded to reach her hand around to the base of her neck, gripping her skin tightly. Bucky Stevie watched in horror as the German woman peeled her face off before their eyes, revealing a hideous red skull shape underneath.

“You don’t have one of those, do you?” Bucky asked Stevie, still staring, shell-shocked, at the beast in front of her.

“You are deluded, Captain.” The red skull told Stephanie, “You pretend to be a simple soldier, but in reality, you are just afraid to admit that we have left humanity behind.” She began to walk back in the direction of the elevator. “Unlike you, I embrace it proudly. Without fear!” She stepped into the open doors of the elevator, pressing a button on the elevator.

“Then how come you’re running?” Stevie countered, fearless. The scarlet beast simply allowed the elevator to close as she smiled back at Stevie. Suddenly, Stevie and Bucky remembered that they were trying to escape an exploding building. Rushing up a flight of stairs, Stevie leading the way, the two searched for a way out. All they found was an unstable support beam between two catwalks.

“Go, one at a time.” Stevie said, helping Bucky over the railing. Carefully, Bucky moved across, looking down at the fiery depths beneath her. She took a deep breath just as the beam beneath her shook, starting to give way. She ran a couple of steps and leapt onto the platform on the other side just as the beam broke and fell down into the blazing landscape. Bucky turned back toward Stevie.

“There’s gotta be a rope, or something!” Bucky yelled to her best friend across the glowing reds and oranges of flame, her soprano voice breaking as she screamed.

“Just go! Get outta here!” Stevie yelled back, waving her onward. She refused to let Bucky die.

“No! Not without you!” Bucky screamed back, knowing she couldn’t handle losing Stevie. She was on the verge of tears, but willed herself not to cry. She was not leaving without Stephanie Grace Rogers. Stevie could see that in her best friend’s eyes. Shrugging slightly, she stepped leaned down and bent the broken railing to make way for herself. She took a few steps back, making Bucky’s eyes widen as she realized what Stevie was about to attempt. Not sure if she could make it, Stephanie dashed forward and leaped across the distance with all her might. As she flung herself through the air, and explosion set off beneath her, sending her rocketing onto the platform, burnt but alive.

“What the hell, Stevie? That’s not what I meant!” Bucky screamed as she helped Stevie to a standing position. She can’t believe her best friend had actually done that risky move.

“C’mon, we’ve gotta get out of here!” Stevie just called back, ignoring Bucky’s concern. Together, the two girls managed to get out of the collapsing building with their lives.

“God,” Bucky said, inhaling huge gasps of breath as she and Stevie walked away from the carnage arm in arm, holding each other upright, “I love you.” Bucky wasn’t entirely sure what she was saying. She was slightly delusional, and adrenaline continued to pump through her veins, though she no longer needed it.

“Really?” Stevie asked, grin slipping from her face. Bucky turned her head, looking up at Stevie and seeing her as she was: fearless, strong, brave, kind.

“Yeah. I do.” Bucky whispered, leaning into Captain America as they walked away from the flaming mess together.


End file.
